Tag Archives: school

A complete 180

I know I haven’t been around much – I’ve had plenty to say but just haven’t found the time to put it all out there. 

Today, I’m frustrated.  Really, I’ve been frustrated for a couple of weeks now.  Colin’s been out of control and I just don’t know what to do – again.

We haven’t changed meds, we haven’t changed routine.  Everything is pretty much the same at the Crazy Antelope House.  Only Colin’s suddenly acting out at every. single. opportunity.

The moment an adult back is turned, he’s up to no good. In the last two weeks he has:

  • bitten Rodeo on the penis
  • spit on his brothers’ food
  • stolen Halloween candy from the kitchen
  • stuck a pair of tweezers in an outlet and blown a fuse (thank god nothing worse happened)
  • stolen a STEAK KNIFE from the kitchen and hid it under his nightstand (which we had turned around to face the wall because he kept hiding things in the drawer)
  • stolen a handful of straight pins from my sewing table and placed them in random places around his room
  • ran AWAY from Rick as he was picking them up from school (he was chasing a friend)

And the latest… today he ran away from school. (more on that in a minute)

We’ve gotten to the point where he has to be in our line of sight during every waking moment.  He’s not allowed to play in his brothers’ room at all and now he’s not even allowed to go to his room, either, unless its bedtime.  So now, it’s almost as if he’s sitting in wait… all I have to do is turn around to pack up leftovers and he’s biting the dog or messing with his brothers, pocketing something that isn’t his, etc.  It’s exhausting.

Today, about 20 minutes before school let out, I got a call.  Colin had run from the school.  I found out later that he was in his special ed class and just out of control.  The Special Ed teacher called the school counselor and asked her to come help.  Shortly after, Colin was spinning and dancing and refused to settle down…then bolted out the door.

He ran out of the school, across the basketball court…and into the woods behind the school.  He refused to come out.  Five different staff members tried to reason with him, but he wouldn’t give in.  Finally, they agreed to let Rick come get him if he’d just come back to the school.

(Rick’s phone went to voicemail so they called me next.  Rick and I then proceeded to try to call each other at the same time!)

Colin’s been suspended for a day.  Rick tried to reason with the staff members, explaining that keeping him home is just reinforcing the bad behavior.  Oh!  If I act like THIS then I get what I want – which is staying home!

Last week, he spent a good 2-3 days pretending he was sick and had lost his voice because he wanted to stay home.  I left work early on Monday to get him and take him to the doctor only to find there was absolutely nothing wrong.  No redness, no drainage, no fever, no strep.  Thursday he went to the nurse again and they called me. I told her if he wasn’t sick (he wasn’t) then he needed to go back to class.

He went back to the classroom and told his teacher that the nurse had told him to get his backpack and walk home – that I’d said it was okay!  Thankfully everyone at the school knows Colin well enough to double-check a story like that.

I don’t know what’s going on.  He does NOT want to be at school, which is obvious.  I don’t know if he’s starting to realize he’s different or what.  That seems to be the case at home – his brothers are definitely noticing more and more.  They have friends; Colin doesn’t really have friends. They’re allowed to go to play at someone’s house for an afternoon; Colin doesn’t get invited. 

I don’t know what else it could be.  Aside from the craziness at school today, he’s been fairly calm when making these horrible choices.  Rick noticed that today – he isn’t manic and impulsive like he used to be during the worst offenses.  In fact, he’s pretty dang calm.

Just this morning, we started having him meet with the play therapist (Dr. H) Robbie & Ryan were going to.  Our plan was to let Colin go every 3rd time, then every other time… slowly phasing R&R out of the therapy sessions.  We explained to them that they are doing great and we are SO incredibly proud of them.  They understand that Colin needs more help.  We also told them the door is open for them to go see Dr. H if they ever feel the need.

Today was his first day of therapy.  I wish he could go back sooner without upsetting the other two, but I don’t see how.

The school also seems to FINALLY be willing to do a psych eval and possibly accept the ASD diagnosis that we’ve had for 2 years now.

I sense some bumpy patches ahead.

So far, so good

We’re almost through our 4th week of school and things are going pretty well!  Colin has had ALL GREEN DAYS.  Amazing.  (Hope I’m not jinxing myself!)  Robbie’s had a couple of yellow days and so has Ryan, but no major issues at all.  And, ho-hum, Robbie got 103 on his first two spelling tests. 

103!  He’s gotten all of the regular weekly words plus the 3 bonus words each time.  Crazy kid!

Colin and Ryan are both reading very well these days, though Colin has trouble reading books due to the ADHD – he gets bored after a few pages and is ready to move on.  I’m just glad his skill has increased.  Baby steps!  

We had family come visit last weekend – Mom, sister, brother, sis-in-law, and our four-legged nieces, Bella & Abby (brother’s dogs).  My brother and sister also invited over an old friend of theirs from high school that was in town.  That brought the total to 7 adults, 3 kids and 4 dogs. I don’t think our house has ever been so full!  But we had a great time – the weather was gorgeous and we had tons of food to eat.  I made kabobs and fruit salad, my mom showed up with some bbq and sides from a place near her.  I’d just picked up my bountiful baskets order (usual basket plus 8lbs of strawberries!), so the kids were constantly begging for apples, strawberries, etc.  Good problem to have!

As the day was winding down and people were helping me clean up, my sister-in-law remarked, “The boys have been really good today.  I mean REALLY good. I’m impressed!”

Usually a change in routine turns into temporary insanity for all three of them – not just Colin!  This past weekend was different.  I don’t know if it was because we were calmer…or because they knew (almost) everyone there…or if it’s just them maturing and growing up a little bit, but we had a great time. 

It’s difficult to notice little changes on a daily basis, but when someone points it out to me, I step back and realize how far our kids have come. 

Four weeks in and not a single red day at school.  That’s pretty awesome. 🙂

“I love school!”

These are words I never heard Ryan say last year.  In fact, it was far more often the opposite came out of his mouth.  He’d say he hated school, we’d ask why…he’d usually say, “Because it’s too hard.”

This post by a fellow blogger made me consider how far we’ve come since last year when it coms to Ryan’s self-esteem.  I’m not sure what changed, but my theory is Ryan’s ability to communicate better has helped him in other aspects of his life.  Speech has always been something he’s struggled with, but over the past two years we’ve seen so much improvement!

Last year, he was getting in trouble left and right for his anger.  He’d get reprimanded for something and the second the teacher went to change his “color” in his folder, he’d just have a meltdown.  The meltdown itself was often more cause for disciplinary action than the original infraction. This would usually all begin with him acting silly in class. 

That’s what Ryan does when he feels uncomfortable or challenged – he makes a joke, giggles, wiggles, etc.  Part of me is glad that he doesn’t immediately resort to anger like he used to, but the silliness can cause problems.

So far this year, we haven’t had any anger issues at all.  In fact, in the first 8 days of school, he’s only had 2 “yellow” days – one was for talking when the teacher was talking and the other was for getting out of line to get a drink after recess.  I’ve never been so proud of yellow days before!  Last year, either of those moves resulting in a color change would have likely developed into a full tilt explosion. 

Ryan’s new mantra has become, “I love school!”  He told us this morning that he loves school, but loves summer, too.  He actually comes home happy and he wants to tell us about his day.  Robbie has the same teacher this year that Ryan had last year.  I jokingly told her the other day that I’ve learned more about her in the last week (through Robbie’s tales of school) than I ever did last year! 

Ryan’s reading has improved so much since last year.  I feel guilty at times for not working with each kid individually more, but I think the combination of our reading time in the evenings (the hour before bed) mixed with a little brotherly competition (Robbie’s by far the strongest reader) has done wonders.  I introduced the boys to Shel Silverstein last year – Where the Sidewalk Ends is one of my favorite books from childhood.  It’s now one of their favorites, too.  Ryan used to struggle reading anything from that book (granted, the poetic license isn’t really teaching grammar or proper pronunciation at times!), but now he’s doing so well. 

As a side note, I’m starting to wonder if books like WSE are better for weak readers than I’d originally thought.  It’s one thing to guess what the next word is, but authors like Silverstein and Dr. Seuss throw you for so many loops that they force you to SOUND IT OUT.  What’s that? You’ve got a Wocket in your pocket?  You went for a ride in a flying shoe with Ickle Me, Pickle Me, Tickle Me, too?  I think these authors – and others like them – help children have FUN with words. 

Last night, Ryan was telling us everything he’d learned in school.  They’re discussing civil rights and he was going on about Thurgood Marshall and Harriet Tubman (though, admittedly, he made us guess at Harriet Tubman – he couldn’t remember her name, just that “she helped people find new homes and she changed her name when she was 18”).  I’ve never heard him go on about what he’d learned in class before.  It was really great to hear him so excited about learning.

I know it’s early in the school year, but this year already feels infinitely better than last year.  Rick’s easing the boys into walking to/from school (currently walking most of the way with them, but will slowly wean them off having him there the whole way).  I’m making them healthy lunches – and they’re coming home with empty lunch boxes most days!  Even Colin is reading better, when he’s willing to sit down and try for more than a few minutes. 

I hope this school year continues to be a good one. Here’s hoping for a good school year for all of you other moms and dads out there, too!

First Day of School!

Like so many other parents, yesterday was a big day for me.  Er, I mean…for my boys!  Yeah, that’s what I meant!

They love Ninjago. Can you tell?

Colin and Ryan both started 2nd grade and Robbie started 1st grade this year.  Colin and Ryan went to the same school last year, so it was exciting to see what teacher they’d have and which friends were in their class again this year, but otherwise they know the ropes pretty well and I’m not terribly worried about them.  As an added bonus, Colin’s special education teacher was also moved to the 2nd grade wing, so that was one less change for him!

Robbie, however, is new to this school. And he’s a 1st grader.  It’s a tad unorthodox, but he really is a sharp kid with a big heart, so I’m hoping he’ll do well.  Of course, I was still a nervous wreck yesterday morning.  I took off for the day and scheduled some other appointments as well, but my main focus was making sure everyone had a smooth start for their first day.

We were all ready to leave the house and walk to school together when we realized Rob’s glasses were missing!  Aw, man!  We searched high and low – all five of us turned everything upside down and still couldn’t find them.  Rob’s response, “Well, we’re going to get new glasses later today, right? So it’s okay.”  Uh. NO.  I mean, yes, we were going to get him an eye exam and get new glasses, but that doesn’t make it okay to lose the first pair.  Those things are EXPENSIVE!

Ryan is blind as a bat without his glasses, so he has kept incredibly good track of them! (The lady at Lenscrafters told us he likely would!)  We just ordered him a new pair the other day, but mainly just because his current ones are a little scratched up and he needed a check up anyhow. 

Rob’s last pair of glasses were purchased in MARCH.  And now they’re MIA.  *sigh*  We learned yesterday afternoon that he needed a new prescription anyhow.  I had been a bad mom and not taken him in for a check up for entirely too long.  He has strabismus (his right eye is not strong and sometimes turns in), so he sees a specialist.  They’re a little harder to get into…and a million other excuses I could make, but won’t.  I won’t let him go that long again.  In fact, with the new script, doc wants to see us back in 2 months anyhow (appointment has already been made!).

Check out those stylish new frames! We swear by these “twistable” frames. I won’t buy anything else. These things are practically indestructible!

I felt bad picking him up from school early on his first day, but it was really great to get the chance to talk to him about his first day at the “big boy” school.  And boy did he have a lot to tell me!  He loves it.  That makes me SO happy.  He also loved the lunch I packed him. I quizzed him about what his favorite parts were (the cheese cubes and the granola) – I’m trying to get away from the boring-old-sandwich routine. 

Robbie’s birthday is in 2 weeks.  Eep!  Starting a new school so soon before your birthday can cause challenges – namely, who do you invite?  I told him he should start thinking about that as his birthday party will probably be on the 15th (we might push it out a week to give him more time) and he’ll have to tell me who he wants to invite.  I wish we could invite the whole class – that would be easier in a way – but I can’t afford a party for 25 kids! 

His response?  He wants to invite his teacher and the other 1st grade teacher (Colin and Ryan’s teachers last year).  I told him he probably needs to think about kids his own age instead.

Best part was all three boys had green days.  Yay!  What a great start to the week.  We had a great dinner, watched a little TV and then spent the last hour reading books before bed.  I’m really glad school is back in session. 🙂